Most men will never make it to the final stage.
It’s no wonder that men love women.
Men experiencing the radiance of feminine beauty are speechless.
Feminine loving vulnerability makes every man want to protect, care and cherish what he witnesses.
A beautiful woman, certain about who she in her feminine is incredibly attractive, but equally scary for an immature man.
So how do we, men, relate to women during our journey through life?
Based on where you are in your journey, it’s very likely that your relationship with women is described by one of these stages.
1. THE ONE AND THE ONLY: First stage.
Man believes, that somewhere in the world there is one woman and one woman only, that is perfectly designed for him and he just needs to find her and never let her go in order to live a happy life.
This woman will love him, accept him and be with him for who he is. He believes that when he finds her, he will live with her “happily ever after”. Whether he knows it or not, his happiness is largely predetermined by his ability to find this woman and be with her.
Usually, he finds his first girlfriend, starts dating her, puts all his hopes in her, breaks up, and ends up heartbroken.
All those hopes he gave up!
He is disillusioned, angry, sad, confused. He blames himself for breaking up the relationship and feels a lot of guilt for not doing everything right.
When the worst part of this shock fades away, he is now able to recover and get back into the world of women. He now wonders…
“How can I get better at this?”
The moment he commits to growth, he enters the second stage.
2. LEARNING TO FUNCTION IN THE WORLD OF WOMEN: Second stage.
The man starts learning to navigate the world of women.
He learns through his own experience. He might know the theory — polarity, emotional tension, sexual tension, masculine leadership, and direction, creating connection — but he hasn’t experienced it yet.
He learns how these experiences work and everytime he experiences something new, his heart sings and his confidence grows.
He gets hurt. He recovers and gets back. His ability to love without losing faith through the pain grows.
He becomes fascinated and humbled by all the possibilities he was blind to in the first stage. He keeps growing as a man and so grows his attractiveness to women.
At some point, he starts experiencing an abundance of women and he loves it! He’s now confident!
He feels grateful for the abundance and as he starts asking himself…
“How do I appreciate what I have even more?”
His primary focus starts shifting from receiving to giving. With that, he moves to the third stage.
3. GIVING & APPRECIATING THE FEMININE SPIRIT: Third stage.
Man has enough experience with women to know what they expect from a man.
He knows what women crave, and what very few men give them because they’ve never done the work to genuinely understand women. Other men didn’t try enough to have the EXPERIENCE necessary to know what women want.
He knows what women want from his own experience. He knows how to give it to them and he enjoys what he receives.
But now, compared to the second stage, he shifted his focus from to giving. He learned, that giving feels even better than receiving.
And with that — he receives even more.
It’s not a Nice Guy pattern giving — giving in order to get without saying it out loud.
In this stage, the giving is unconditional and intentional.
He has already experienced the abundance of the feminine, he loves the gifts it has for a man — from the loving acceptance, nurturing presence, and inspiring beauty to the raw unfiltered desire, playfulness, and consensual power games that create so much spark.
He experienced it all. And with experience, he learned that there is one thing that is common to interaction with all women.
It’s her very essence: her feminine spirit.
He loves the feminine spirit, the feminine energy.
And he loves it so much, that he wants to expand it and nurture it within women.
He knows that giving to this feminine spirit makes the woman expand all the best in her. It feels so good that he can’t resist it.
And not only he makes her and the world better by being giving and loving, he now receives even more of the feminine gifts that he could ever expect.
How could he resist?
He listens through the heart and his abundance expands.
And when he sees the equally powerful feminine beauty and spirit in all women, he suddenly makes a simple switch and moves to the last, fourth stage.
With that, he also comes back home.
4. THE ONE AND THE REAL: Fourth stage.
Because man can see the feminine spirit in all women, he made a decision to see the feminine spirit of all women in one woman.
He commits to loving her and nurturing her feminine spirit for life.
There is a massive difference between the first and the fourth stage, though.
In the first stage, he committed to one woman because he believed that she can bring him the ultimate happiness. He was there to be a taker, or a transactionist (giving and receiving should be somewhat balanced).
In the fourth stage, he committed to one woman because he decided to give her love unconditionally. He accepted reality, where he believes, he is absolutely responsible for everything that happens to him.
He experienced it over and over again and he knows it works. Now he chooses to give love because it feels wonderful.
“The only way to feel love is to give love. Blessed is the giver.” -Lester Levenson
Because he loves without expecting anything in return, he finds a woman that is a vibrational match to his energy and she will love him the same way.
Love in this relationship grows with age, the connection deepens and it’s an absolute pleasure to watch kids grow up in this environment.
It’s a very mature and conscious relationship, based on mutual respect, absolute individual responsibility, personal integrity, powerful faith in only the best of the traits of the other person, and a higher purpose, that both of them committed to love and live for.
Quite paradoxically, this the relationship that the man in the first stage was looking for.
Not every man goes through all four stages. None of the stages is better than the other.
That would be like comparing early childhood with puberty on which one is better.
All these stages just are. They just exist.
I believe the process of arriving at the fourth stage is different for each man.
Some men are pretty stubborn and they just won’t believe in the fourth stage so they have to go full circle.
Some discover the feminine essence of one woman during the second stage and they just want to nurture that forever.
Some men start their first romantic relationship and they build their way to the fourth stage with the same woman.
And some men never grow up to their full masculine potential of relating to the feminine.
Women are mysterious. And it’s good.
It allows you to stay curious to explore their mystery even more. It allows you to discover the courage to dig deeper and grow.
And when you let go of wanting to figure the mystery (your woman) out, you can fall in love with the process of exploration.
I created a Masterclass on Natural Masculine Confidence — 5-Step Strategy My Clients Use To Eliminate Their Nice Guy Pattern in Busines & Dating. You can watch it for free here.